Dengue

On Monday, September 23, I awoke in my mosquito tent, had devotions, did my morning routine, and headed out to water the garden like I do every morning. I did some watering, and then I did some tree pruning while Teacher Gaby finished the watering. For the past week or so, I had felt unusually tired — I had been getting enough sleep, but was exhausted each morning and didn’t know why. This particular morning I felt like I really needed to go inside and lay down. I finished pruning prematurely and headed inside. When I got my temperature checked, I had a fever of 101. I rested in my bed the rest of Monday, and I enjoyed getting to call my parents for a while to help pass the time. Unfortunately, I also started having worse GI issues than before. Minor GI problems are a rather common occurrence here because of the lack of clean water, but mine were getting much worse. Monday night was very difficult. My fever rose until it was 103.8, and I had the worst headache I’ve ever had. My back ached too. I couldn’t sleep until around 2 am because I was so uncomfortable.

When I awoke the next morning, blessedly my fever and headache were gone. I rested most of the day once again and got to talk on the phone to my parents. However I began to notice potential signs of internal bleeding, so our nurse, Sophia, started doing some research and continued to keep an eye on me to make sure I was doing okay.

By Wednesday morning, we were pretty sure that I had internal bleeding going on, so I went to town with Sophia and another little girl who had a dentist appointment. Her name is Ellie also, although I think it may be spelled differently than my name. She was absolutely thrilled to be going into town. She had her hair done and was wearing a cute little outfit. When we arrived in town, we went to the lab to get tests done on me. This lab was surprisingly clean. It was even smelled clean. I was amusing at how much lack of privacy there was in the waiting room. It was a tiny room — about the size of a bedroom. Lots of people were crammed into it waiting for the doctor, and as the receptionist would question each patient about his/her name, age, symptoms, and general health problems, everyone sitting around would watch and listen interestedly.

Below: Ellie and Ellie headed into town for our checkups :)

First, I had a test that confirmed that I was indeed bleeding internally, although we did not know where. Then I had a blood test to see if they could find out what sickness I had. I was nervous that I would pass out (because I do not always handle blood draws very well), but they did not take very much blood so it wasn’t too scary. While waiting for the test results, Sophia and I went to a restaurant to get food with a very excited Ellie (little Ellie, not me). While she eagerly skimmed over the menu, I sat at the table wishing I could eat. My appetite had been mostly gone since Monday and when I was weighed Wednesday evening, I had lost ten pounds since having arrived in Bolivia. Unfortunately, since we were not sure if I would need to get an endoscopy to try to find the bleeding location, I could not eat yet even though my appetite was slowly coming back.

Below: I got used to getting my blood pressure taken in the most random places!

I’d like to say that this whole time I wasn’t afraid, but that would be a lie. It was a little bit hard for me to hold back tears as we rode in the taxi back to the lab. It was so scary not knowing what was actually going on inside me and not knowing how to help it. It was also scary because I knew that if I had an emergency, there was no help for it closer than in Santa Cruz. Although Santa Cruz is an hour+ flight away, there were not flights scheduled to go there until Friday, so a six hour taxi ride to another town and then a flight was my only option. Everyone told me “don’t go to the hospital in Rurre”, because they don’t have good sanitation practices. Thankfully, the clinics had a slightly better sanitation record, although only once did the person drawing my blood wear gloves. But regardless, if something happened, I was not a 911 call away from help. I prayed and prayed for God to be with me and help me, and He did.

I then rested in the hammocks at a nearby hotel for a while while Sophia went with Ellie back to the orphanage. She texted me that I could try to eat something, because I wasn’t going to have an endoscopy. I was thrilled, and I went to the Roots cafe and ordered hibiscus herbal tea and a sandwich. After not eating for so many days, that sandwich was one of the yummiest I’ve ever had, and I was pleased that I had enough appetite for it at the moment. I enjoyed the hibiscus tea a lot too, until I decided to look it up and realized hibiscus is a blood thinner. I decided to let Sophia drink the rest of it, as having thinner blood wasn’t exactly something I needed since I was already bleeding internally.

Below: My hibiscus tea and Palta sandwich.

Sophia met up with me again, and told me that I had tested positive for Dengue. Dengue is a virus that is transmitted through mosquitos. There is no cure for it. People just have to do their best to take care of themselves and pray their body handles it alright. Bleeding internally any time is a cause for concern, but Dengue is known to cause major hemorrhaging in severe cases. Consequently, we were a bit concerned that I already had an internal bleed and also had dengue which could be potentially contributing to the bleeding.

After eating, Sophia and I went in search of a place that could potentially give me an ultrasound to see if we could find the bleed. We were informed that one clinic’s ultrasound machine was currently in Trinidad, so that was not very helpful. Finally we got a ride all the way across town to another clinic. As Sophia and I walked up the short driveway, I remarked about how it looked just like a regular house. We entered the door and found ourselves in a rather stuffy, hot room that did not smell clean. I observed that soiled gauze and other medical supplies were scattered about the counter. A lady sat at the kitchen counter, and she did not acknowledge us for a while, so we took a seat. Finally, she asked us questions and started writing down my information. She asked where we were from, and when we said we were from Familia Feliz, she said that she remembered a nurse who was there a couple years ago. Turns out, it was Sierra, my sister. She was pleased to find out that I was Sierra’s sister, and somehow it comforted me that Sierra had been to this clinic before. Eventually, the receptionist told us we were supposed to wait there for five minutes for the doctor. About an hour later, Sophia and I were still sitting there, sweating because it was so hot, and waiting for the doctor. When he finally showed up, we followed him into one of the examination rooms. He was a kind, jokey sort of guy. When we told him were from Familia Feliz (literally “happy family” in Spanish), he laughed and joked that he was from “Familia Triste” (“sad family” in Spanish). He suggested that I get yet another blood test.

This time, the nurse led us through a hallway that led through several different rooms with cots in them. It was a little bit awkward, because there were some patients relaxing on the cots, and I felt like we were walking through their personal space. But nobody seemed to think much of it. My second blood test went well, and when we took the results back to the doctor, he concluded that I didn’t need an ultrasound because it wouldn’t really be helpful. So we decided to start me on antibiotics to try to fight my GI infection. We gathered that my bleeding was probably caused by my GI infection that had been going on for a few weeks. However, we had to be very careful because if I started bleeding excessively due to Dengue, I could bleed out and die if I wasn’t close enough to a place (like Santa Cruz) where I could get blood transfusions. The doctor then proceeded to show us pictures of his family and tell us about where he was from. He was a very friendly, helpful person. Finally, Sophia and I hopped in a tiny Torito (the three-wheeled taxis), and headed back to Familia Feliz, stopping to get some ant poison first because I was concerned about my garden.

Below: The pretty view outside of one of the clinics I went to.

When I arrived back at Familia Feliz, I tried to eat some food, talked to my concerned family and boyfriend, and stopped in at the Lillas to make a brief appearance at two of the girls’ birthday party. I had heard that Kelsey was starting to feel sick too, so I stopped in and checked on her. By the time I got back to my house, I was totally exhausted and drained. My back still hurt a bit, but for the most part that was my only pain. My stomach also felt very sensitive and was inflamed (likely related to the bleeding), but for the most part I was just exhausted from doing the littlest things.

As I lay in bed that night, I felt more alone than I have ever felt. My family and friends were so far away and help was far away. As I lay there sadly, I felt like I should open the Bible app on my phone and look at the verse of the day. It was found in Psalm 139, so I decided to read the whole chapter. I started to cry as I read about how God knows everything about me, He formed my organs that were bleeding right then, He knew this would happen before I even arrived in Bolivia, and He has “hedged me behind and before.” Psalms‬ ‭139‬:‭7‬-‭10‬  says,

”Where can I go from Your Spirit? Or where can I flee from Your presence? If I ascend into heaven, You are there; If I make my bed in hell, behold, You are there. If I take the wings of the morning, And dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea, Even there Your hand shall lead me, And Your right hand shall hold me.“

I realized that even in the uttermost parts of the sea, or in the jungles of Bolivia far from home, I can trust that Jesus’ hand will guide and hold me. Jesus gave me such peace as I pictured Him holding me in His hand. I was finally able to fall asleep as I rested in the peace that Jesus was with me even when no one else was.

The next morning was Thursday, my day off! I headed to town around 7 am, with my day off crew (which included a rather feverish Kelsey who was still determined to go to town). We caught a taxi and went to Roots for breakfast. I was happy to be eating food, but I felt so tired and weak. It was hot too, which didn’t help me feel better. Finally I decided to go to the bathroom, and when I looked in the mirror, I realized something was off — I looked so pale. I went back to the table and Carlie and Kelsey confirmed how pale I looked, so I texted Sophia (who was also on her way to town for our day off). I wanted to go lay down, but she insisted (rightly so) that I go get another blood test. After my blood test, I went to Hotel Takana which kindly lets us use their hammocks all day for a small fee. I laid down in a hammock and Sophia took my blood pressure. It was low, so she went to the store to get some stuff to help me. Sierra called me and told me I needed to drink more water.

I was so lethargic that all I wanted to do was take a nap, but she said, “if you want to wake up from your nap, you need to go drink water now.” Leave it to a sister to tell it to you straight! Needless to say, I filtered some water and started drinking it. She also told me that they were in the process of trying to decide if I needed to fly to Santa Cruz or not. If we waited until Friday when a flight leaves for Santa Cruz, it may be too late. But if we started driving now, I could start bleeding out in the middle of the mountains between us and Santa Cruz, and that would not be ideal either.

As I lay in that hammock, I considered for one of the first times in my life, the potential reality of what might happen. I thought, “what if I were to die right now??” I started to pray so very hard. Not only did I want to live and be able to go home after my SM year, but I also did not want my family and friends to have to struggle with losing me. While I was praying hard, I know there were other people praying hard for me too. I was filled with gratitude as I thought about how blessed I am to have so many people in my life who care enough to pray for me. What a gift we have in prayer! No matter how far away we are from them, we can support and help someone else just by praying for them.

Sophia came back, and informed me that she was going to start an IV on me to keep me hydrated. I really hate needles, so I was not excited to get an IV, but I trusted Sophia’s judgement. I have to say it’s a first for me to have an IV started in a hotel courtyard while I’m laying in a hammock in a jungle town of Bolivia.

Below: my IV and hammock.

Shortly after, Kelsey got a blood test as well, because she was feeling worse. It turned out that she has Dengue too.  At that point, my kind parents decided to pay for a hotel room for Kelsey, Sophia and I to stay in for the night. My IV bag was hung from the curtain rod, and we settled in, enjoying the air conditioning.

Below:

(First photo) Sophia and I figuring out my IV bag situation.

(Second photo) Kelsey and I settling in.

That evening, Kelsey and I were able to enjoy some ice cream and empanadas that Laney brought us. Kelsey, in reference to the food, said, “this probably isn’t good for my physical health, but it sure is good for my mental health!” And it was true! Our appetites had definitely been affected, but we were glad that we were able to eat a little bit of food. We also enjoyed having Matthew, Carlie, and Familia Feliz’s directors come visit us for a while. Then we slept. I found out that it is rather hard to sleep when I have a needle stuck in my arm. Sweet Sophia spent a long night on the hard floor, waking up frequently to check our blood pressures and oxygen levels.

Below: Two happy girls with ice cream.

Friday morning, we headed to the clinic for yet another blood test to see if our platelet levels were rising. By this time, the lab receptionist recognized us and felt bad for us being frequent visitors. So he gave us a discount on our labs. This was my 5th needle prick, and I was not very happy about it. Then we went back to the hotel and decided to stay for another night. Thankfully, my platelets were starting to rise little by little.

Below: At the clinic!

Kelsey and I got to eat lunch at Luz Del Mar, and ate so much food because we were so hungry after not eating much for a long time. Our appetites were finally strong enough to eat a full meal! Then we shopped a little bit and rested more. We also enjoyed getting some more ice cream and checking out a party that was being set up in the town square. All of this time, I still had the IV needle in my arm, but I was disconnected from the fluids bag and tubing. That evening, we scooted the twin beds together to make room for Sophia to have a bed too, and I spent another rather uncomfortable night with my IV in.

Below: (First photo) At Luz de Mar excited for food.

(Second photo) Hanging out with Sophia and Kelsey in our room.

The next morning was Sabbath, and we were sad that we were missing the church service. The hotel staff were so kind and let us rest in the hammocks for free that morning, until someone could pick us up. There were several kind people in town who would ask Sophia how we were doing periodically, because they had heard we had dengue.

Below: A few fun moments over the course of our time in town: (left to right)

1. Kelsey, a bit shocked when the door handle came off in her hand.

2. On the way to the lab, yet again.

3. I spilled chocolate on my shirt and was quite the sight with a sopping wet shirt from scrubbing it and with my IV needle in my arm.

Finally, someone from Familia Feliz came to pick us up. Kelsey and I were so happy because it felt like we were being discharged from the hospital. When we arrived at the orphanage, we moved back into the clinic and rested.

Below: On the way home, and finally back at Familia Feliz!

On Saturday night, I finally got my IV out and I was ecstatic. I now have so much sympathy for people who have to have IV’s in their arms for extended periods of time. I can only imagine how tough it must be after having one for 48 hours. We are still resting at the time that I’m writing this (Tuesday, October 1). And unfortunately, Sophia has now tested positive for Dengue. Those mosquitos are out to get us! Please pray for her recovery as well. I am so beyond grateful for the attentive care she gave me and Kelsey both. She was truly such a huge blessing.

Below: I was so happy to have my IV out that Sophia took a photo of me holding the tube right after it came out.

We are getting more and more strength back every day. After finishing my antibiotic, my internal bleeding has stopped too! Today I made a papaya leaf juice for me and Sophia and Kelsey. It is supposedly very helpful with dengue, but it is absolutely disgusting too.

I came away from this whole experience with a few different takeaways. One is that God truly does keep His countless promises to be with us always and give us strength and peace. When I didn’t have anyone to lean on and no safe medical system to trust in, He was there to hold me and give me peace. I didn’t know what the outcome of this would be, and I’m so grateful that it was positive. But even if it hadn’t been, I could have still rested assured that Jesus was in control, holding me in the palm of His hand, and giving me peace. He also sent people like Sophia and Kelsey to help me get through this hard time. He prompted so many people to support me by praying for me. And He gave me a family who was supportive, even though they were far away. God really is faithful and true to His word. He doesn’t ever leave or forsake us, no matter what is going on.

Secondly, I learned what a gift life is, and how easily it can be taken away. It is something to be treasured as a great blessing from God. It truly is a gift from Him just to be alive. I hope that after this experience, I will be more intentional to value each day that I’m given and use it for His honor and glory. What I hope you take away from this story is that God is so faithful, prayer is so powerful, and life is so precious. ♥️

Below: So so happy to be able to go back and see the kids again little by little as I get stronger!